Posted by Tom Mason on May 23, 2001 at 10:35:25:
In Reply to: Raising a family while being a musician posted by Tubanator on May 22, 2001 at 20:07:49:
I have been married for 13 years to a speech pathgologist who played sax in high school. She plays piano in church when needed.
Before I married, I took gigs whenever they came. I comitted to summer tours outside of the teaching season, and could play whenever and wherever I desired.
After marriage, and before children; I had to cut the more non-productive gigs. This hurt me at first, but I soon learned that I got more out of gigs that paid more and used better musicians.
When the children came, I settled down. I got to where I only took ane gig a week at most. The teaching provided a steady income, and I wanted to spend time with the family. When the bills got tight, I could always play more.
I am happy because I have been on the road, on stage, and in the classroom. Although my present school isn't a large 300 piece high school opr college band, I am teaching musicians how to play. Although I haven't gone on a two month tour with a big band lately, I do get to play when the big names come through.
All of this is said because I am satisfied with my situation.
You will have to determine what you can be satisfied with, and go get it. While there is time to do many things, you do have to move in a direction to achieve your goals. Seek the truth in your feelings, and make sure that your future partner can live with those goals. You can work out problems and needs if you are both on the right path.
Tom Mason